SUPERNATURAL 5X22

CAST:

JARED PADALECKI as SAM WINCHESTER

Jared Padalecki stars in The CW's thriller "Supernatural" as Sam Winchester, the sweet reluctant hero who joins forces with his older brother Dean (Jensen Ackles) to battle demons.

JENSEN ACKLES as DEAN WINCHESTER

Jensen Ackles plays Dean Winchester, the rugged bad boy who teams up with his younger brother Sam (Jared Padalecki) to battle evil supernatural forces on "Supernatural."

MISHA COLLINS as CASTIEL


Misha Collins stars as Castiel, the angel who pulled Dean from Hell in The CW's thriller "Supernatural." He, and others like him, are intervening in human affairs for the first time in 2000 years, because the armies of hell are on the move, and Lucifer has been released.


SUPERNATURAL PLOT:

Supernatural stars Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki as Dean and Sam Winchester, two brothers who travel the country looking for their missing father and battling evil spirits along the way.
Sam Winchester is a college student bound for law school, determined to escape his family's past -unlike his older brother, Dean. Ever since they were little their father has been consumed with an obsession to find the evil forces that murdered his beloved wife, in result recruiting and training his two young sons to help him in revenge. They have grown up as hunters of the supernatural. Sam escaped under the premise of going to college, and now has a happy life with his girlfriend, Jessica, and a promising future career. Dean, however, stayed behind with his father to join him in his "hunting".
Dean goes to Sam for help when their father goes missing. Now Sam must join his brother to find him. His one weekend trip to search for the missing John Winchester becomes an ongoing quest after a horrible tragedy ruins any thought of a happy life for Sam.
The two brothers, bound by tragedy and blood to their mission, travel across the country encountering terrifying and dangerous forces most believe to be nothing but superstition and folklore, such as the Lady in White, the Indian beast known as the Wendigo, Phantom Travelers who cause plane crashes, Bloody Mary, vampires, demons and many more.

SEASON 5 PLOT:

Season Five consists of 22 episodes and was rumored to be the last season, due to Eric Kripke′s statements over the years that he had planned for the show to run for only five seasons. Despite this, Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles had contracts for a sixth season, and The CW renewed the series on February 16, 2010.
The fifth season revolves around the fight to stop Lucifer and save the world from the Apocalypse. Throughout the season, Dean and Sam battle both angels and demons as they fight their destiny to become the vessels of Michael and Lucifer. Unable to defeat Lucifer, they collect the rings of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, which act as the keys to Lucifer′s prison. The idea of destiny versus freedom and choice play a big role.
Throughout the season, Dean, Sam, Castiel, and Bobby each have a crisis as they near giving up. However, through each other′s support, they continue forward until the end.

SUPERNATURAL 5X22 PLOT:

As he writes his final story, Chuck talks about the one millionth car that, after its first owner died, John Winchester bought it, and that's where the story begins, and ends.
Dean tells Sam that he's finally going to let Sam choose what he wants, and he'll back his play. Dean assures Sam that if anyone can do it, it's him. He asks Sam if it's what he wants, and Sam says that it's his responsibility.
Sam, Castiel, Dean, and Bobby go demon hunting to collect the blood necessary to power Sam up to contain Lucifer. Dean reminds Sam that Lucifer said he'd take Sam in Detroit, and figures that Lucifer is playing them. Sam admits that all they can hope for is that Lucifer doesn't know about the Lucifer rings. He then asks Dean to promise that he won't try and bring Sam back. Sam tells him to find Lisa and have a normal life.
Lucifer asks why they came to him and Sam explains that he is there to say "yes. Lucifer says that he knows about the Horsemen rings He wants to have a one-on-fight with Sam. there's a flash of light. When it fades, Sam is lying on the floor and Lucifer's host body has vanished. Dean throws the rings at the wall where they stick, and then chants an invocation.
Sam wakes up and turns around, and Lucifer tells Dean that Sam is long gone. He seals the portal leading to the cage and takes the rings, and then teleports away.
Castiel says that there's no hope, and that Lucifer and Michael will meet on the chosen field. Dean tells them he's going to try to get through to Sam, and he has nothing to lose. Castiel warns that the only thing he'll see is Michael killing Sam. Dean insists that he won't let Sam die alone and drives away.
At Stull Cemetery, Lucifer and Michael talk about their destiny. both of them admit they wish they didn't have to do it. Lucifer wonders why, and Michael says that he doesn't have a chance after what Lucifer did. Suddenly, they're interrupted when Dean arrives in the Impala, playing rock music.
Dean gets out and says they need to talk. Michael and Lucifer both tell him that he's no longer involved, but Dean insists on talking to Lucifer for five minutes. He then turns to Dean and slams him into the Impala. Lucifer continues to beat him while saying that Sam will hear the snap of every one of Dean's bones. Bloody and beaten, Dean insists that he won't leave him.
Sam takes control of his body, tells Dean that it will be okay, and then uses the rings to open the portal to the cage. As Sam prepares to jump in, Michael arrives and says he has to fight his brother and fulfill his destiny. Sam starts to fall backward. When Michael tries to stop him, Sam grabs him and they fall in together.

TAPESCRIPTS:
Swang song
[67][104]* there'll be peace|when you are done *
[105][143]* lay your weary head to rest *
[144][185]* don't you cry no more *
[185][210]You're gonna suck it up,|accept your responsibilities,
[211][243]And play the roles that|destiny has chosen for you.
[244][255]You're <i>the</i> vessel.|Michael's vessel.
[256][269]The answer's no.
[270][284]You know who I am. Lucifer.
[285][302]You're the one, sam.|You're my vessel.
[303][313]That'll never happen.
[314][342]* ahh, ahh, ahh *
[343][379]* once I rose above the|noise and confusion *
[380][399]Hi, lisa. Things are|about to get really bad.
[400][424]Whatever you're thinking of doing,|don't do it. I have to.
[424][440]<i>The cage you sprung lucifer from -|-</i>
[441][457]<i>You can shove his ass back in.</i>
[458][489]<i>The key to the cage -|</i> <i>four rings from the horsemen.</i>
[490][507]Who is it? That's our brother.
[508][526]What do you mean adam is gone?|The angels took him.
[527][542]Maybe they're moving|on from you, dean.
[543][563]Think adam's okay?
[563][577]Doubt it.
[578][602]* I hear the voices|when I'm dreaming *
[602][627]What if <i>you</i> guys lead the devil to|the edge and <i>I</i> jump in?
[627][648]Are you idjits trying to kill me?!
[648][682]* carry on, my wayward son *
[683][698]You're going to let your brother
[699][725]Jump right into that fiery pit.
[726][741]What exactly are you afraid of?
[742][753]Losing?
[754][766]Or losing your brother?
[767][794]* don't you cry no more *
[851][882]<i>On April 21, 1967,</i>
[883][908]<i>The 100 millionth gm vehicle</i>|<i>rolled off the line</i>
[909][928]<i>At the plant in janesville --</i>
[928][955]<i>A blue two-door caprice.</i>
[956][976]<i>There was a big ceremony, speeches.</i>
[976][1014]<i>The lieutenant governor[1] even showed up.</i>
[1014][1048]<i>Three days later, another car rolled|off that same line.</i>
[1049][1074]<i>No one gave two craps about her.</i>
[1074][1100]But they should have.
[1101][1128]<i>Because this 1967 chevrolet|impala</i>
[1129][1155]<i>Would turn out to be the|most important car --</i>
[1169][1198]No, the most important <i>object</i> --
[1198][1216]In pretty much the whole universe.
[1217][1251]<i>She was first owned by sal moriarty,</i>
[1252][1293]<i>An alcoholic with two ex-wives</i>|<i>and three blocked arteries.</i>
[1293][1332]<i>On weekends, he'd drive around giving|bibles to the poor.</i>
[1333][1357]<i>"gettin' folks right for judgment day.|"</i>
[1357][1377]<i>that's what he said.</i>
[1378][1392]<i>Sam and dean don't know any of this,</i>
[1393][1417]<i>But if they did, I bet they'd smile.</i>
[1418][1458]<i>After sal died, she ended up at|rainbow motors[2],</i>
[1458][1488]<i>A used-car lot in lawrence,</i>
[1489][1515]<i>Where a young marine bought|her on impulse.</i>
[1516][1552]<i>That is, after a little advice</i>|<i>from a friend.</i>
[1553][1588]<i>I guess that's where this story begins.</i>
[1605][1624]And here's where it ends.
[1703][1712]Hey.
[1805][1815]Dean?
[1827][1836]What's going on?
[1856][1867]I'm in[3].
[1893][1906]In with...?
[1907][1928]The whole "up with satan" thing[4].
[1929][1947]I'm on board.
[1964][1978]You're gonna let me say yes?
[1979][2004]No. That's the thing.
[2004][2032]It's not on me to <i>let</i>|you do anything.
[2055][2083]You're a grown -- well,|<i>overgrown [5]--</i> man.
[2103][2120]If this is what you want,|I'll back your play.
[2137][2161]That's the last thing I|thought you'd ever say.
[2162][2172]Might be.
[2188][2204]I'm not gonna lie to you, though.
[2205][2232]It goes against every fiber I got.
[2258][2276]I mean, truth is...
[2305][2347]...You know,|watching out for you...
[2347][2379]It's kinda[6] been my job, you know?
[2380][2404]But more than that, it's...
[2405][2423]It's kinda who I am.
[2423][2452]You're not a kid anymore, sam,
[2453][2471]And I can't keep|treating you like one.
[2513][2535]Maybe <i>I</i> got to grow up a little,|too.
[2574][2605]I don't know if we got|a snowball's chance[7].
[2606][2641]But...
[2641][2668]But I do know that if|anybody can do it...
[2669][2679]It's you.
[2713][2731]Thank you.
[2731][2753]If this is what you want...
[2777][2797]Is this <i>really what you want?</i>
[2829][2843]I let him out.[8]
[2874][2892]I got to put him back in.
[2919][2937]Okay.
[2958][2978]That's it, then.
[3433][3458]I still can't get used|to you at eye level.[9]
[3459][3474]So, was I right?
[3475][3488]As always, yoda.
[3489][3511]Two stunt[10] demons inside,|just like you said.
[3512][3531]Did you get it?
[3532][3558]Yeah, all the "go|juice" sammy can drink.
[3575][3586]You okay?
[3587][3597]Not really.
[3597][3613]What do you got?
[3614][3640]Not much. These look|like omens[11] to you?
[3641][3653]Cyclone in florida,
[3654][3677]Temperature drop in detroit,|wildfires in l.A.
[3678][3693]Wait. What about detroit?
[3693][3711]Temp's dropped about 20 degrees,
[3712][3737]But only in a five-block|radius of downtown motown.
[3738][3750]That's the one.
[3750][3767]Devil's in detroit.
[3768][3778]Really?
[3779][3796]As far as foreboding goes[12],
[3797][3813]It's a little light in the loafers[13].
[3814][3823]You sure?
[3824][3844]Yeah, I'm sure.
[3990][4011]Aw. Ain't he a little angel?
[4057][4080]Angels don't sleep.
[4160][4189]Sam, I got a bad|feeling about this.
[4189][4209]Well, you'd be nuts to have a|<i>good</i> feeling about it.
[4210][4223]You know what I mean.
[4223][4237]Detroit.
[4238][4263]He always said he'd jump|your bones in detroit.
[4263][4274]Here we are.
[4274][4289]Here we are.
[4290][4309]Maybe this is him rolling out|the red carpet, you know?
[4310][4325]Maybe he knows something|that we don't.
[4325][4350]dean, I'm sure he knows a|<i>buttload</i> we don't.
[4351][4376]We just got to hope he|doesn't know about the rings.
[4450][4479]Hey, um...
[4479][4492]On the subject[14],
[4492][4507]There's something I got|to talk to you about.
[4507][4517]What?
[4517][4532]This thing goes our way
[4533][4560]And I...Triple lindy|into that box...
[4584][4604]...Y-you know I'm not coming back.
[4624][4636]Yeah, I'm aware.
[4637][4671]So you got to promise me something.
[4671][4692]Okay. Yeah. Anything.
[4718][4736]You got to promise not|to try to bring me back.
[4754][4765]What?
[4766][4786]No, I didn't sign up for that.
[4786][4801]Dean --
[4802][4817]Your hell is gonna make my|tour look like graceland.
[4818][4838]Y-you want me just to|sit by and do nothing?
[4838][4857]Once the cage is shut,|you <i>can't</i> go poking at it [15] , dean.
[4858][4867]It's too risky.
[4868][4880]No, no, no, no, no.
[4881][4894]As if I'm just gonna|let you rot in there.
[4894][4908]Yeah, you are.|You don't have a choice.
[4909][4920]You can't ask me to do this.
[4920][4932]I'm sorry, dean. You <i>have</i> to.
[4971][4989]So then what am I supposed to do?
[4990][5014]You go find lisa.
[5015][5034]You pray to god she's dumb[16] |enough to take you in,
[5035][5076]And you -- you have barbecues|and go to football games.
[5077][5109]You go live some normal,|apple-pie life, dean.
[5130][5146]Promise me.
[5335][5346]Demons.
[5347][5364]At least two dozen of them.
[5365][5379]You were right -- something's up.
[5380][5398]More than something.
[5399][5414]He's here. I know it.
[5618][5632]I'll see ya around [17] , kid.
[5633][5647]See ya around.
[5744][5772]He gets in...
[5773][5799]You fight him tooth and nail[18] ,|you understand?
[5799][5825]Keep swingin'[19]. Don't give an inch[20].
[5826][5838]Yes, sir.
[5956][5972]Take care of these guys, okay?
[5987][6003]that's not possible.
[6038][6060]Then humor me.
[6060][6081]Oh. I was supposed to lie.
[6095][6116]Uh...
[6117][6137]Sure. They'll be fine. I --
[6138][6158]Just -- just stop...Talking.
[6319][6337]You mind not watching this?
[6519][6534]Okay.
[6535][6551]Let's go.
[6630][6652]All right!
[6653][6676]We're here, you sons of bitches!
[6677][6698]Come and get it!
[6732][6749]Hey, guys.
[6750][6764]Is your father home?
[6865][6882]Hey, guys.
[6883][6900]So nice of you to drop in[21].
[6985][7001]<i>The impala, of course,</i>
[7002][7021]<i>Has all the things other cars have...</i>
[7022][7040]<i>And a few things they</i> don't.
[7051][7069]<i>But none of thattutuff's important.</i>
[7070][7106]<i>This</i> is the stuff|that's important.
[7107][7126]<i>The army man that sam crammed|in the ashtray[22] --</i>
[7127][7146]<i>It's still stuck there.</i>
[7147][7171]<i>The legos that dean shoved</i>|<i>into the vents --</i>
[7172][7203]<i>To this day, heat comes on and|they can hear 'em rattle [23] .</i>
[7203][7233]<i>These are the things that make|the car theirs --</i>
[7234][7258]Really <i>theirs.</i>
[7258][7281]<i>Even when dean rebuilt her</i>|<i>from the ground up,</i>
[7281][7309]<i>He made sure all these little|things stayed,</i>
[7310][7333]<i>'cause it's the blemishes [24] </i>|<i>that make her beautiful.</i>
[7354][7371]<i>The devil doesn't know or care</i>
[7371][7391]<i>What kind of car the boys drive.</i>
[7414][7433]Sorry if it's a bit chilly [25] .
[7433][7464]Most people think I burn hot.
[7464][7490]It's actually quite the opposite.
[7491][7506]Well, I'll alert the media.
[7579][7601]Help me understand something, guys.
[7602][7619]I mean, stomping|through my front door
[7620][7659]Is...A tad suicidal,|don't you think?
[7660][7676]We're not here to fight you.
[7677][7688]No?
[7689][7700]Then why are you?
[7700][7720]I want to say "yes."
[7731][7739]Excuse me?
[7820][7839]Chock-full [26] of ovaltine, are we?
[7840][7855]You heard me.
[7856][7865]Yes.
[7866][7886]You're serious.
[7918][7944]Look, judgment day's [27] | a runaway train [28] .
[7945][7963]We get it now. We just want off.
[7964][7973]Meaning?
[7974][8000]Deal of the century.
[8001][8028]I give you a free ride,|but when it's all over,
[8029][8056]I live, he lives,|you bring our parents back --
[8056][8076]Okay, can we please|drop the telenovela?
[8091][8110]I know you have the rings, sam.
[8153][8172]I have no idea what|you're talking about.
[8188][8221]The horsemen's rings?
[8222][8255]The magic keys to my cage?
[8256][8285]Ring a bell? [29]
[8286][8309]Come on, sam.|I've never lied to you.
[8310][8335]You could at least pay|me the same respect.
[8353][8381]It's okay. I'm not mad.
[8381][8408]A wrestling match [30] | inside your noggin...[31]
[8409][8430]I like the idea.
[8431][8476]Just you and me,|one round, no tricks.
[8477][8503]You win, you jump in the hole.
[8504][8522]<i>I</i> win...
[8522][8550]Well, then I win.
[8551][8575]What do you say, sam?
[8576][8598]A fiddle of gold against your soul
[8599][8616]says I'm better than you-ou.
[8662][8682]So he knows.|Doesn't change anything.
[8683][8696]Sam.
[8697][8711]We don't have any other choice. No.
[8746][8762]Yes.
[8969][8991]<i>Bvtmon...</i>
[8992][9007]<i>Tabges...</i>
[9008][9029]<i>Babalon.</i>
[9157][9165]Sammy!
[9166][9182]Dean! Sammy!
[9193][9220]I can feel him.
[9221][9236]Oh, god! You got to go now!
[9237][9249]Come on!
[9279][9301]Go now, sammy.
[9302][9318]Now!
[9513][9528]I was just messing with you. [32]
[9543][9560]Sammy's long gone.
[9605][9649]<i>Chdr bvtmon tabges babalon.</i>
[9903][9928]I told you...
[9928][9956]This would always|happen in detroit.
[10233][10263]Sam.
[10264][10275]Come on.
[10288][10309]I can feel you...
[10309][10331]Scratching [33] away in there.
[10369][10399]Look...
[10400][10421]I'll take the gag [34] off, okay?
[10478][10493]You got me all wrong, kiddo.[35]
[10510][10523]I'm not the bad guy here.
[10524][10550]I'm gonna rip you apart|from the inside out.
[10550][10566]Do you understand me?
[10588][10611]Such anger...
[10612][10627]Young skywalker.
[10673][10688]Who are you <i>really angry with?</i>
[10689][10705]Me?
[10706][10723]Or that face in the mirror?
[10723][10748]I'm sure this is all a|big joke to you, huh?
[10748][10759]Not at all.
[10759][10776]I've been waiting for you...
[10776][10821]For a long, <i>long</i> time.
[10821][10841]Come on, sam.
[10842][10861]You have to admit --
[10861][10888]You can feel it, right?
[10889][10898]What?
[10899][10914]The exhilaration [36].
[10915][10935]And you know why that is?
[10936][10967]Because we're two|halves made whole. [37]
[10967][10983]M.F.E.O.
[10983][10995]Literally.
[10996][11026]This feels pretty|damn far from good.
[11027][11058]I'm inside your grapefruit, sam.
[11058][11090]You can't lie to me.
[11091][11110]I see it all --
[11110][11140]How odd you always felt,
[11140][11180]How...Out of place
[11181][11205]In that... Family of yours.
[11223][11250]And why shouldn't you have?
[11251][11272]They were foster[38] care -- at best.
[11272][11297]<i>I'm</i> your real family.
[11297][11313]No, that's not true.
[11314][11323]It is.
[11336][11353]And I know you know it.
[11354][11382]All those times you ran away,
[11382][11401]You weren't running from <i>them.</i>
[11402][11416]You were running towards <i>me.</i>
[11470][11489]This doesn't have to be|a bad thing, you know.
[11501][11525]I let dean live, didn't I?
[11525][11540]I <i>want</i> him to live.
[11541][11565]I'll bring your folks[39] back, too.
[11565][11605]I want you to be happy, sam.
[11606][11637]I don't want <i>anything from y..</i>
[11652][11672]Really?
[11689][11708]Not even a little payback?
[11708][11724]What's that supposed to mean?
[11724][11754]Look closely.
[11755][11790]None of these little devils|look familiar to you?
[11826][11858]That's mr. Bensman...
[11859][11874]One of my grade-school teachers.
[11874][11906]And that's your friend doug|from that time in east lansing.
[11907][11941]And rachel...
[11942][11957]Your prom date.[40]
[11957][11999]Sam winchester, this is your life.
[11999][12016]Azazel's gang[41]
[12016][12051]Watching you since|you were a rugrat,[42]
[12052][12089]Jerking you around|like a dog on a leash.[43]
[12108][12125]I know how you feel about them.
[12126][12145]Me too.
[12145][12180]So, what do you say you and|I blow off a little steam?
[12198][12227]<i>Reports are flooding in --</i>|<i>a 7.6 earthquake in portland,</i>
[12227][12245]<i>8.1 in boston,</i>
[12246][12271]<i>More in hong kong, berlin,|and tehran</i>
[12272][12297]<i>The u.S.G.S. Has no explanation</i>
[12297][12322]<i>But says to expect a six-figure|death toll.</i>
[12322][12339]It's starting.
[12339][12362]Yeah, you think, genius?
[12362][12385]You don't have to be mean.
[12386][12401],, what do we do now?
[12425][12475]I suggest we imbibe[44] copious|quantities of alcohol...
[12476][12495]Just wait for the|inevitable blast wave.[45]
[12496][12510]Swell. Thank you, bukowski.
[12510][12522]I-I mean, how do we stop it?
[12561][12572]We don't.
[12591][12625]Lucifer <i>will</i> meet michael|on the chosen field,
[12626][12645]And the battle of|armageddon begins.
[12646][12665]Okay, well,|where's this chosen field?
[12665][12680]I don't know.
[12680][12709]Well, there's got to be|something that we can do.
[12709][12735]I'm sorry,eaean. This is over.
[12736][12758]You listen to me,|you junklessisissy --
[12759][12775]We are <i>not</i> giving up!
[12776][12790]Bobby?
[12812][12821]Bobby?
[12881][12911]There was never|much hee b begin wh.
[12935][12955]I don'n'knknow whatat ee totoo.
[13163][13188][ exhales sharply y
[13188][13208]So...
[13208][13225]Are we having fun yet?
[13299][13313]<i>In between jobs,</i>
[13314][13334]<i>Sam and dean would sometimes|get a day --</i>
[13334][13357]<i>Sometimes a</i> week, <i>if they were lucky.</i>
[13357][13381]<i>They'd pass the time lining|their pockets[46] </i>
[13381][13403]<i>Sam used to insist on honest work,</i>
[13404][13440]<i>But now he hustles [47] pool,|like his brother.</i>
[13441][13464]<i>They could go anywhere and do anything.</i>
[13465][13488]<i>They drove 1,000 miles</i>|<i>for an ozzy show,</i>
[13489][13513]<i>Two days for a jayhawks game.</i>
[13535][13550]<i>And when it was clear,</i>
[13551][13578]<i>They parher in the middle of nowhere,</i>
[13579][13611]<i>Sit on the hood,|and watch the stars...</i>
[13612][13644]<i>For hours...</i>
[13645][13646]<i>Without saying a word.</i>
[13647][13684]Word.
[13685][13708]<i>It never occurred to them</i>|<i>that, sure,</i>
[13709][13737]<i>Maybe they never really had</i>|<i>a roof and four walls,</i>
[13738][13777]<i>But they were never, in fact, homeless.</i>
[13801][13825]That's a good line.
[13873][13885]Mistress magda?
[13886][13918]Um, no, chuck.
[13919][13938]Oh, uh, dean.
[13939][13965]Uh, wow. I, uh,|I didn't know that you'd call.
[13966][13980]Who's mistress magda?
[13980][13997]Nothing. She's a, uh, a --
[13997][14021]Just a, uh... A close friend.
[14021][14045]Yeah, I'll bet -- <i>real</i> close.|Whatever happened to becky?
[14046][14058]Didn't work out.
[14059][14090]I had too much respect for her.
[14091][14108]Boy, you really got a whole|virgin/hooker thing going on, don't you?
[14108][14125]Okay, this can't be why you called.
[14141][14157]Sam said yes.
[14158][14175]I know.
[14175][14194]I saw it.
[14194][14212]I'm just working on the pages.
[14213][14233]Did you see where the|title fight goes down?
[14245][14258]The angels are keeping|it top secret --
[14258][14268]Very hush-hush [48].
[14269][14279]Aw, crap.
[14280][14295]But I saw it anyway.
[14296][14325]Perks of being a prophet.
[14325][14353]It's tomorrow, high noon --
[14353][14377]Place called stull cemetery.
[14378][14397]Stull ceme--
[14398][14411]Wait. I know that.
[14412][14439]That's -- that's an old|boneyard[49] outside of lawrence.
[14439][14449]Why lawrence?
[14450][14462]I don't know.
[14462][14477]It all has to end where|it started, I guess.
[14477][14489]All right, chuck, look,
[14490][14507]You know of any way to|short-circuit this thing?
[14508][14518]Besides the rings?
[14519][14542]No. I'm sorry.
[14543][14555]Well, do you have any idea|what's gonna happen next?
[14555][14567]I wish that I did.
[14584][14599]But I-I just -|I honestly don't know yet.
[14621][14638]All right. Thanks, chuck.
[14701][14719]You goin' someplace?
[14758][14783]You're goin' to do|somethin' stupid.
[14784][14802]You got that look.
[14803][14822]I'm gonna go talk to sam.
[14823][14841]You just don't give up.
[14841][14853]It's sam!
[14853][14867]If you couldn't reach him here,
[14868][14882]You're certainly not gonna be|able to on the battlefield[50].
[14883][14896]Well, if we've already lost,
[14897][14912]I guess I got nothing|to lose, right?
[14931][14958]I just want you to understand --
[14959][14994]The <i>only</i> thing that you're|gonna see out there
[14995][15020]Is michael killing your brother.
[15065][15083]Well, then I ain't gonna|let him die alone.
[15495][15515]It's good to see you, michael.
[15515][15534]You too.
[15545][15560]It's been too long.
[15561][15573]Can you believe it's finally here?
[15602][15611]No.
[15612][15642]Not really.
[15663][15676]Are you ready?
[15735][15749]As I'll ever be [51].
[15767][15794]A part of me wishes we|didn't have to do this.
[15823][15837]Yeah.
[15838][15855]Me too.
[15855][15871]Then why <i>are</i> we?
[15871][15883]Oh, you know why.
[15902][15918]I have no choice,|after what you did.
[15918][15938]What I did?
[15939][15955]What if it's not my fault?
[15956][15967]What is that supposed to mean?
[15967][15976]Think about it.
[15977][16005]Dad made everything.
[16005][16049]Which means he <i>made</i> me who I am.
[16050][16075]God <i>wanted</i> the devil.
[16075][16093]So?
[16093][16111]So why?
[16112][16126]And why make us fight?
[16126][16160]I just can't figure out the point[52].
[16160][16178]What's <i>your</i> point?
[16196][16212]We're going to kill each other.
[16213][16236]And for what?
[16237][16258]One of dad's tests.
[16259][16278]And we don't even know the answer.
[16300][16313]We're brothers.
[16331][16365]Let's just walk off the chessboard.
[16423][16450]I'm sorry. I-I can't do that.
[16467][16488]I'm a good son,|and I have my orders.
[16489][16501]But you don't have to follow them.
[16501][16521]What, you think I'm gonna rebel[53]?
[16521][16531]Now?
[16532][16548]I'm not like you.
[16549][16561]Please, michael --
[16562][16587]You know, you haven't changed a bit,|little brother.
[16587][16612]Always blaming[54]|everybody but yourself.
[16613][16639]We were together. We were happy.
[16640][16659]But you betrayed[55] me -- all of us --
[16659][16673]And you made our father leave.
[16673][16692]No one makes dad do <i>anything.</i>
[16693][16713]He is doing this <i>to</i> us.
[16749][16783]You're a monster, lucifer.
[16784][16800]And I have to kill you.
[16817][16836]If that's the way it's got to be...
[16870][16892]...Then I'd like to see you try.
[17104][17130]* gunter, glieben,|glauchen, globen *
[17166][17201]* all right *
[17201][17230]* I got something to say *
[17230][17250]* hey *
[17250][17278]* it's better to burn out *
[17278][17291]* yeah *
[17292][17334]* than fade awa-a-a-y *
[17334][17349]* all right *
[17386][17403]* oh! *
[17465][17479]Howdy, boys.
[17479][17501]* we're gonna burn|this damn place down *
[17502][17516]* ooh, ooh *
[17517][17536]* down to the ground *
[17537][17555]Sorry. Am I interrupting something?
[17582][17593]Hey.
[17593][17608]We need to talk.
[17673][17692]Dean.
[17692][17712]Even for you,
[17713][17741]This is a whole new|mountain of stupid[56].
[17742][17770]I'm not talking to <i>you.|I'm talking to sam.</i>
[17770][17795]You're no longer the vessel, dean.
[17796][17810]You got no right to be here[57].
[17832][17859]Adam, if you're in there somewhere,|I am so sorry.
[17859][17877]Adam isn't home right now.
[17877][17895]Well, then you're next|on my list, buttercup.
[17896][17913]But right now, I need five|minutes with <i>him.</i>
[17914][17926]You little maggot[58].
[17926][17948]You are no longer a|part of this story!
[17949][17962]Hey, ass-butt![59]
[18102][18124]"ass-butt"[60]?
[18125][18148]He'll be back -- and upset --
[18148][18170]But you got your five minutes.
[18170][18185]Castiel.
[18208][18255]Did you just molotov my|brother with holy fire?
[18272][18283]Uh...No.
[18283][18310]No one dicks[61] with michael but <i>me.</i>
[18443][18474]Sammy, can you hear me?
[18501][18518]You know...
[18519][18543]I tried to be nice...
[18544][18563]For sammy's sake[62].
[18564][18583]But you...
[18584][18612]Are such a pain...[63]
[18613][18643]In my ass[63].
[18812][18821]n-o-o-o-o!
[18837][18846]Yes.
[18918][18936]Sammy?
[18936][18956]Are you in there?
[18957][18971]Oh, he's in here, all right.
[18987][19012]And he's gonna feel the|snap of your bones.
[19050][19069]Every single one.
[19087][19107]We're gonna take our time.
[19167][19188]Sam, it's okay.
[19189][19206]It's okay. I'm here.
[19207][19218]I'm here.
[19218][19233]I'm not gonna leave you.
[19255][19268]I'm not gonna ave you.
[20002][20012]It's okay, dean.
[20031][20046]It's gonna be okay.
[20068][20078]I've got him.
[20184][20238]<i>Bvtmon tabges babalon.</i>
[20512][20525]Sam!
[20540][20560]It's not gonna end this way![64]
[20561][20573]Step back!
[20573][20589]You're gonna have to <i>make</i> me!
[20590][20612]I have to fight my brother, sam!
[20613][20631]Here and now!
[20631][20647]It's my destiny!
[21423][21443]Cass, you're alive?
[21443][21464]I'm better than that.
[21629][21646]Cass, are you god?
[21646][21671]That's a nice compliment[65].
[21671][21681]But no.
[21699][21731]Although, I do believe|he brought me back.
[21759][21781]New and improved[66].
[22078][22096]<i>Endings are hard.</i>
[22120][22139]<i>Any chapped[67]-ass monkey</i>|<i>with a keyboard</i>
[22140][22178]<i>Can poop out a beginning,|but endings are impossible.</i>
[22179][22199]<i>You try to tie up every loose end,</i>
[22200][22211]<i>But you never can.</i>
[22212][22231]<i>The fans are always gonna bitch.</i>
[22231][22248]<i>There's always gonna be holes.</i>
[22249][22266]<i>And since it's the ending,</i>
[22266][22282]<i>It's all supposed to add|up to something.</i>
[22283][22305]<i>I'm telling you, they're a raging|pain in the ass[68].</i>
[22357][22375]What are you gonna do now?
[22376][22398]Return to heaven, I suppose.
[22399][22417]Heaven?
[22418][22431]With michael in the cage,
[22432][22448]I'm sure it's total|anarchy up there.
[22449][22464]So, what, you're the|new sheriff in town?
[22489][22504]I like that. Yeah. I suppose I am.
[22504][22518]Wow.
[22519][22541]God gives you a brand-new,|shiny set of wings[69],
[22542][22562]And suddenly you're|his bitch again.
[22563][22578]I don't know <i>what</i> god wants.
[22578][22597]I don't know if he'll even return.
[22597][22626]It just...Seems like|the right thing to do.
[22627][22645]Well, if you do see him,
[22645][22661]You tell him I'm|coming for him next.
[22683][22698]You're angry.
[22718][22735]That's an understatement[70].
[22735][22748]He helped.
[22749][22764]Maybe even more than we realize.
[22764][22780]That's easy for <i>you</i> to say.|He brought you back.
[22781][22796]But what about sam?
[22796][22809]What about <i>me,</i> huh?
[22810][22826]Where's my grand prize?
[22827][22852]All I got is my brother in a hole!
[22866][22882]You got what you asked for, dean.
[22895][22924]No paradise. No hell.
[22925][22951]Just more of the same.
[22973][22989]I mean it, dean.
[22989][23016]What would you rather have?
[23017][23046]Peace or freedom?
[23125][23157]Well, you really suck[71] at goodbyes,|you know that?
[23224][23250]<i>This is the last dean and bobby</i>|<i>will see of each other</i>
[23251][23279]<i>For a very long time.</i>
[23325][23349]<i>And, for the record[72],|at this point next week,</i>
[23350][23379]<i>Bobby will be hunting a rugaru</i>|<i>outside of dayton.</i>
[23380][23397]<i>But not dean.</i>
[23398][23419]<i>Dean didn't want cass to save him.</i>
[23420][23442]<i>Every part of him,|every fiber[73] he's got,</i>
[23442][23459]<i>Wants to die</i>
[23460][23482]<i>Or find a way to bring sam back.</i>
[23482][23503]<i>But he isn't gonna do either.</i>
[23504][23527]<i>Because he made a promise.</i>
[23618][23635]hey, lisa.
[23636][23664]Oh, thank god.
[23664][23677]Are you all right?
[23710][23732]Yeah.
[23732][23760]Uh, if it's not too late, I...
[23761][23786]Think I'd like to take|you up[74] on that beer.
[23808][23830]It's never too late.
[23909][23928]It's okay.
[23929][23956]It's gonna be okay.
[23995][24021]<i>So, what's it all add up to?[75]</i>
[24022][24042]<i>It's hard to say.</i>
[24042][24069]<i>But me, I'd say this</i> was <i>a test...</i>
[24070][24091]<i>For sam and dean.</i>
[24092][24114]<i>And I think they did all right.</i>
[24115][24143]<i>Up against good, evil,</i>
[24144][24192]<i>Angels, devils, destiny,|and god himself,</i>
[24193][24220]<i>They made their own choice.</i>
[24221][24246]<i>They chose family.</i>
[24246][24270]<i>And, well...</i>
[24270][24295]<i>Isn't that kinda the whole point?[76]</i>
[24361][24387]<i>No doubt -- endings are hard.</i>
[24388][24419]<i>But then again...</i>
[24420][24450]<i>Nothing ever really ends,|does it?</i>
[24571][24593]You okay?
[24593][24615]Yeah, I'm good.

GLOSSARY:

lieutenant governor[1]: vicepresidente.
rainbow motors[2]: asilo de coches.
I'm in.[3]: estoy dentro.
The whole "up with satan" thing[4].: el plan para acabar con satán.
overgrown [5]: supergrande.
kinda[6]: el tipo de.
snowball's chance[7]: minima oportunidad.
I let him out.[8]: yo lo dejé salir.
I still can't get used to you at eye level.[9]: no me acostumbro a verte de pie.
stunt[10: atrofiados.
omens[11]: presagio.
As far as foreboding goes[12]: tengo un presentimiento.
loafers[13]: zapatos.
On the subject[14]: hablando de eso.
go poking at it [15]: entrar en él.
dumb[16]: tonta.
I'll see ya around [17]: nos vemos luego.
You fight him tooth and nail[18]: lucharás con uñas y dientes.
Keep swingin'[19].:mantente balanceando.
 Don't give an inch[20].:no cedas una pulsada.
So nice of you to drop in[21].: un placer que hayais venido.
in the ashtray[22]: en el cenicero.
hear 'em rattle [23]: oir el sonajero.
blemishes [24]: granos
chilly [25]: fresco.
Chock-full [26]: hasta los topes.
judgment day's [27]: el día del juicio final.
 a runaway train [28]: un tren fuera de control.
Ring a bell? [29]: ¿te suena familiar?.
A wrestling match [30] : combate de lucha libre.
noggin...[31]: cabeza.
I was just messing with you. [32]: sólo bromeaba.
Scratching [33]: escarbando.
gag [34]: mordaza.
kiddo.[35]: chico.
exhilaration [36]: resocijo.
We’re two|halves made whole. [37]: somos dos mitades que nos complementamos.
foster[38]: adoptivo.
folks[39]: padres.
prom date.[40]: cita del baile de graduación.
gang[41]: banda.
rugrat,[42]: niño.
leash.[43]: correa.
we imbibe[44]: bebamos.
blast wave.[45]: onda del choque.
lining|their pockets[46]: llenándose los bolsillos.
he hustles [47] :juega.
Very hush-hush [48]: muy secreto
boneyard[49]: cementerio
battlefield[50]: campo de batalla
As I'll ever be [51]: como nunca he estado
I just can't figure out the point[52]: simplemente no puedo entender la razón
rebel[53]: rebelarse
blaming[54]: culpamos
betrayed[55]: traicionaste
This is a whole new|mountain of stupid[56]: es una nueva de enorme estupidez
You got no right to be here[57]: no tienes derecho a estar aqui
maggot[58]: gusano
ass-butt![59]: idiota
"ass-butt"[60]: le has pateado el culo
dicks[61]: se mete
For sammy's sake[62]: por el bien de Sammy
Are such a pain... In my ass [63]: eres como un dolor en mi trasero
It's not gonna end this way![64]: no tiene que acabar de esta manera
That's a nice compliment[65]: es un hermoso compliment
improved[66]: mejorado
chapped[67]: agrietado
they're a raging|pain in the ass[68]: sin una verdadera molestia
shiny set of wings[69]: nuevo equipo de alas
understatement[70]: eufemismo
suck[71]: apestas
for the record[72]: para que conste
fiber[73]: fibra
to take|you up[74]: tomarme
what's it all add up to?[75]: cual es el significado de esto
Isn't that kinda the whole point?[76]: acaso, ese no es el punto?

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER 1X01

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER
1X01 - PILOT
ORIGINAL AIRDATE (CBS): 19-SEP-2005

WRITTEN BY CRAIG THOMAS
DIRECTED BY PAMELA FRYMAN

TRANSCRIBED BY LUGUA FOR TWIZ TV.COM - FREE TV SCRIPTS DATABASE
DO NOT ARCHIVE/REPOSTE ANYWHERE ON THE INTERNET!
Feedback welcome! Luay_jamal@hotmail.com

==========================
DISCLAIMER:
==========================

The following is not a novelization or an actual script but a dry transcript of the aired episode that includes accurate word-to-word dialogues, settings descriptions, action scenes and/or camera movements where the transcriber felt they were necessary. This transcript is posted on "TWIZ TV.COM - FREE TV SCRIPTS DATABASE" in IN WORLD WIDE WEB EXCLUSIVITY courtesy of LUGUA. "HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER" and other related entities are owned, (TM) and © by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION. All Rights Reserved. This transcript is posted here without their permission, approval, authorization or endorsement. Any reproduction, duplication, distribution or display of this material in any form or by any means is expressly prohibited. It is absolutely forbidden to use it for commercial gain.
==========================
TRANSCRIPT:
(*Notes* There was one brief second or two in Scene four which couldn't be scripted)
==========================

Scene One

[Title: The Year 2030]

Narrator: Kids, I’m going to tell you an incredible story. The story of how I met your mother

Son: Are we being punished for (estar castigados por) something?

Narrator: No

Daughter: Yeah, is this going to take a while?

Narrator: Yes. (Kids are annoyed(enfadados)) Twenty-five years ago, before I was dad, I had this whole other life.

(Music Plays, Title “How I Met Your Mother” appears)

Narrator: It was way back in 2005. I was twenty-seven just starting to make it as an architect and living in New York with my friend Marshall, my best friend from college. My life was good and then Uncle Marshall went and screwed the whole thing up.

Marshall: (Opens ring) Will you marry me.

Ted: Yes, perfect! And then you’re engaged (comprometidos), you pop the champagne! You drink a toast! You have sex on the kitchen floor… Don’t have sex on our kitchen floor.

Marshall: Got it. Thanks for helping me plan this out, Ted.

Ted: Dude, are you kidding(bromeando)? It’s you and Lily! I’ve been there for all the big moments of you and Lily. The night you met. Your first date… other first things.

Marshall: (laughs) yeah, sorry. We thought you were asleep.

Ted: It’s physics Marshall, if the bottom bunk (litera) moves, the top bunk moves too. My god, you’re getting engaged tonight.

Marshall: Yeah, what are you doing tonight?

(Scene Freezes)

Narrator: What was I doing? Your Uncle Marshall was taking the biggest step of his life, and me—I’m calling your Uncle, Barney.

[Cut to Later: Barney’s in the barber shop, Ted’s talking from home]

Barney: (on the phone) hey, so you know how I’ve always had a thing for half-Asian girls? Well, now I’ve got a new favorite: Lebanese girls! Lebanese girls are the new half-Asians.

Ted: Hey, you wanna do something tonight?

Barney: Okay, meet me at the bar in fifteen minutes, and Suit up!

----------------

Scene Two

(The Bar)

Ted: Hey.

Barney: Where’s your suit(traxe)!?  Justwhen I say suit up, I wish you’d put on a suit.

Ted: I did that one time.

Barney: It was a blazer (tipo de chaqueta)!

Ted: You know, ever since college it’s been Marshall and Lily and me. Now it’s going to be Marshall and Lily… and me. They’ll get married, start a family—before long I’m the weird (raro,extraño), middle-aged bachelor their kids call “Uncle Ted”.

(Barney hits Ted)

Barney: I see what this is about. Have you forgotten what I said to you the night we met?

[Cut to Flashback the night Barney and Ted met]

[Still in the Bar]

(Ted is talking to another couple; Barney randomly (por casualidade) joins them and interrupts)

Barney: Ted, I’m going to teach you how to live. (Ted’s shocked) Barney, we met at the urinal.

Ted: Oh, right. Hi.

Barney: Lesson one, lose the goatee (perilla). It doesn’t look good with your suit.

Ted: I’m not wearing a suit.

Barney: Lesson two, get a suit. Suits are cool. (Points to self with bear bottle in hand) Exhibit A. (Flirts to a woman unseen(“sen ser visto”)) Lesson three, don’t even think about getting married till you’re… thirty.

[Flashback ends]

Ted: Thirty, right. You’re right. I guess it’s just, you’re best friend gets engaged—you start thinking about that stuff (posibilidade, asunto,cousa).

Barney: I thought I was your best friend. Ted, say I’m your best friend.

Ted: You’re my best friend, Barney.

Barney: Good! And as your best friend, I suggest we play a little game called… “Have you met Ted?”

Ted: Wai—no, no, no. We’re not playing “Have You Met Ted?”

Barney: (Taps (toque de silencio) a woman names Yasmine) Hi, have you met Ted? (Leaves and watches from a distance).

Ted: (To Yasmine) Hi, I’m Ted.

Yasmine: Yasmine.

Ted: It’s a very pretty name.

Yasmine: Thanks, It’s Lebanese.

------------

Scene Three

(The Apartment)

Marshall: Hey!

Lily: Urgh. I’m exhausted. It was finger painting day at school, and a five year old boy (takes coat off revealing (atrevido, revelador) a purple hand print on her right breast(peito)) got to second base with me. Wow, you’re cooking?

Marshall: Yes, I am.

Lily: Aww—(They kiss) Are you sure that’s a good idea after last time? You looked really creepy (asqueroso) without eyebrows.

Marshall: I can handle (manexar) this; I’m full of surprises tonight.

Lily: So there’s more surprises? Like what?

Narrator: Marshall was in his second year of law school, so he was pretty good at thinking on his feet.

Marshall: BOOGITY BOO! And that’s all of them! I’m goanna go… cook. (Leaves)

[Cut to the bar, Ted is chatting with Yasmine]

Ted: I’m so happy for Marshall, I really am. I just couldn’t imagine settling down (establecendose) right now.

Yasmine: So do you think you’ll ever get married?

Ted: Well maybe eventually. Some fall day. Possibly in Central Park. Simple ceremony, we’ll write our own vows(votos, promesa). But--eh--no DJ, people will dance. I’m not going to worry about it! Damn it(maldita sea), why did Marshall have to get engaged? (Yasmine laughs) Yeah, nothing hotter than a guy planning out his own imaginary wedding, huh?

Yasmine: Actually, I think it’s cute.

Ted: Well, you’re clearly drunk (claramente borracho) (pulls her wine glass away. Hold up glass to bartender (barman)) ONE MORE FOR THE LADY!

[Cut to Kitchen with Marshall and Lily. Lily has a pan out sautéing, Marshall jumps off a countertop (mostrador,encimera)]

Marshall: Okay, look what I got (runs to the fridge. Takes out wine bottle)

Lily: Aw—honey. Champagne! (hands it to Marshall)

Marshall: (after short silence) Yeah. (hands it back)

Lily: (realizing) No, you are too old to be scared to open a bottle of champagne!

Marshall: I’m not scared.

Lily: Then open it!

Marshall: Fine (takes bottle. Looks at it for a couple of seconds) Please open it (hands it to Lily)

Lily: You are unbelievable, Marshall. No—(Scene splits (se divide) in half and shows both Lily and Marshall on top arguing and Ted and Yasmine on the bottom mingling)

Narrator: There are two big questions a man has to ask in life. One you plan out (planificar) for months, the other just slips out (sale) when you’re half drunk at some bar.

Marshall: (To Lily) will you marry me?

Ted: (To Yasmine) you wanna go out sometime?

(Scene split ends, and returns to Lily and Marshall’s scene)

Lily: Of course, you idiot! (hugs (abrazar) him and they fall back)

[Cut to Scene with Ted and Yasmine at bar]

Yasmine: I’m sorry; Carl’s my boyfriend (points to bartender)

Ted: Sup, Carl?

[Cut to Scene in Kitchen, Marshall and Lily lay up (“deixar na cama”) while on the ground, after sex]

Marshall: I promised Ted we wouldn’t do that.

Lily: Did you know there’s a pop tart under your fridge?

Marshall: No, but dibs (diñeiro a pagar). Where’s that champagne? I wanna drink a toast with my fiancé.

Lily: aww (claps(aplausos). They kiss)

Marshall: I don’t know why I was so scared of this. Pretty easy right? (Pops cork, hit’s Lily’s eye)

Lily: (YELLS)

Marshall: (covers mouth) OH!

Ted: Why am I freaking out (volvendose tolo) all of a sudden? This is crazy! I’m not ready to settle down (sentar a cabeza).

Barney: (ignoring) how does Carl land (conseguir) a Lebanese girl?

Ted: It’s always been “don’t even think about it till you’re thirty”

Barney: Exactly—the guy doesn’t even own a suit!

Ted: Plus Marshall’s found the love of his life. Even if I was ready, which I’m not, but if I was it’s like, “Okay, I’m ready! Where is she?” (Spots Robin)

Narrator: and there she was.

[Fade out]

---------

 Scene Four

(The Bar—Focusing on (centrándose) Ted and Robin)

Narrator: It was like something from an old movie. Where the sailor sees the girl across the crowded dance floor, turns to his buddy (amigo) and says, “see that girl? I’m going to marry her someday”

Ted: Hey Barney, see that girl?

(Breif cut-out (recorte) portion)

Barney: (to Robin) Hey, have you met Ted?

Robin: Let me guess, (points) Ted?

(Ted Nods(“afirmar coa cabeza”))

--------

Scene Five

(Taxi on the way to hospital)

Marshall: I’m sorry, Lily. I’m so sorry. Take us to the hospital.

Cabdriver: Whoa, whoa, whoa—did you hit her?

(Laughter)

Lily: Hit me? Please, this guy could barely (apenas) even spank(tocar o cu) me in bed for fun. He’s all like, (hits ice in bag using to cover eye) “Oh, did that hurt?” and I’m like, “Come on, let me have it you pansy (pensamento)!” (realizes) Wow, complete stranger.

Cabdriver: no, no, no, no—it’s okay, go on. (Turns meter on.) So these, spankin’s…you in pajamas (pixamas) or going “naturelle”

[Cut to bar with Robin]

Ted: So what do you do?

Robin: I’m a reporter for Metro News 1.

Ted: (nods) Oh.

Robin: Well, kind of a reporter. I do those dumb (mudo) little fluff (pelusa) pieces at the end of the news, you know. Like—um—monkey that can play the ukulele. I’m hoping to get some bigger stories soon.

Ted: Bigger like, uh, gorilla with an up-right bass? Sorry, you’re really pretty. (Robin laughs and waves (facer sinais) to her friends) Oh, your friends don’t seem too happy.

Robin: Yeah, see the one in the middle just got dumped (deixar,abandonar) by her boyfriend so tonight every guy is… “The enemy”.

Ted: You know if you don’t make your friend feel better you could throw a drink at my face. I don’t mind.

Robin: She would love that! It does look fun in the movies.

Ted: Hey, you wanna have dinner with me Saturday night?

Robin: Oh, I can’t. I’m going to Orlando for a week on Friday. Some guys attempting to make a big (cut) so my news is covering it.

Ted: That’s going to take a week?

Robin: Yeah, he’s going to eat it too, it’s another record.

Robin’s Dumped Friend: Hey, what’s taking so long?

Ted: Uh, I know this is a long shot, but how about tomorrow night?

Robin: (stops) Yeah, (agrees) What the hell (passes number to Ted. Throws drink on Ted’s face) JERK!(estúpido) (Walks away. Whispers) that was fun.

Barney: (comes back laughing(risueño, alegre)) De—wait for it—nied! Denied!

Ted: We’re going out tomorrow night.

Barney: I thought we were playing laser tag (lector de etiquetas) tomorrow night?

Ted: Yeah, I was never going to go play laser tag. (Wipes(limpiarse) alcohol off his face)

------

Scene Six

(Bistro, Ted’s date with Robin. There’s a blue French horn(trompa) showcased on the wall a table away from theirs.)

Narrator: The next night, I took her out to this little bistro (tipo de restaurante) in Brooklyn.

Robin: Wow that is one bad-ass blue French horn.

Ted: Yeah.

Robin: Mhmm.

Ted: Sort of looks like a… Smurf penis(pitufo pene).

(Scene Freezes)

Narrator: Son, a piece of advice. When you go on a first date you really don’t wanna say “smurf penis”. Girls don’t ordinarily like that.

(Scene unfreezes (descongelante). Robin spits (escupir) her drink back into her glass. Laughs)

Narrator: But that was no ordinary girl.

[Cut to the Apartment]

(Lily and Marshall are sitting on the couch (sofá). Lily’s wearing an eye patch on her left eye and is totally unaware (non era consciente) that Marshall is sitting bedside her because of the eye patch.)

Marshall: Lilly?

(Lily jolts)

Lily: How long have you been sitting there!? Stupid eye patch.

(Ted enters)

Ted: Mom, dad, I have found the future Mrs. Ted Mosby! Marshall, how have I always described my perfect woman?

Marshall: Oh let’s see (thinks) she likes dogs?

[Flashback to Date]

Robin:  I’ve got five dogs.

[Flashback over.]

Marshall: …she drinks scotch?

[Flashback to Date]

Robin: I love a scotch that’s old enough to order its own scotch.

[Flashback over.]

Marshall: Can quote(citar) obscure lines from “Ghostbusters”?

[Flashback to Date]

Robin: Ray, when someone asks you if you’re a god you say, “Yes!”

[Flashback over.]

Ted: And I’m saving the best for last.

[Flashback to Date]

Robin: Do you want these? (Holding up remaining olives from her plate) I hate olives.

[Flashback over.]

Marshall: She hates olives! Awesome!

Lily: The olive theory.

[Flashback to Date]

Ted: The olive theory is based on my friends, Marshall and Lily. He hates olives, she loves them. In a weird (estraño) way that’s what makes them such a great couple. A Perfect balance (eats olive).

Robin: You know, I’ve had a jar(tarro,bote) of olives just sitting in my fridge forever.

Ted: (flirting) I can take them off your hands.

Robin: (flirting back) they’re all yours.

[Flashback over]

Marshall: Oh, it is on! It is on (imitates robot) till the break of dawn(amencer).

Lily: wait, it’s only the break of ten-thirty. What happened?

[Flashback to Walking Robin home]

Robin: I’ve gotta get one of those blue French horns for over my fireplace (chimenea). It’s gotta be blue, it’s gotta be French.

Ted: No Green Clarinet?

Robin: No.

Ted: Come on, no purple tuba?

Robin: It’s a smurf penis, we’re no dice.

(Metro News 1 Van appears)

Producer: (from inside van) there you are! We’ve got a jumper! Some crazy guy on the Manhattan Bridge. Come on, you’re covering it!

Robin: Um, alright. I’ll be right there. (To Ted) I’m sorry. I had a really great time tonight.

Ted: Yeah.

[Flashback Over]

Marshall: So? Did you kiss her?

Ted: No. The moment wasn’t right. (They sigh) Look, this woman could be my future wife; I want our first kiss to be amazing.

Lily: Aww, Ted that’s so sweet. So you chickened out (acobardarse) like the little bitch.

Ted: What? I did not chicken out! You know what? I don’t need to take first kiss advice from some pirate who hasn’t been single since the first week of college.

Lily: Ted, anyone who’s single would tell you the same thing. Even the dumbest (máis tonta) single person alive, and if you don’t believe me…call him.

(Calls Barney)

(Barney’s playing laser tag on the other end of the line)

Barney: (Phone) Hey loser, how’s not playing laser tag? Because playing laser tag is awesome! Oh, I killed you Connor; don’t make me get your mom!

Ted: Hey, listen. I need your opinion on something.

Barney: Okay, meet me at the bar in fifteen minutes—AND SUIT UP!

[Slides to Bar Scene]

(Lily, Ted, Barney and Marshall sitting at a table)

Ted: So these guys think I chickened out. What do you think?

Barney: I can’t believe you’re still not wearing a SUIT!

Ted: She didn’t even give me the signal.

Barney: What is she goanna—is she goanna bat (pestañear, facer olliños) her eyes at you in Morse code (bats eyes)?? Ted (bats eyes) Kiss me—No, you just kiss her!

Ted: Not if you don’t get the signal.

Barney: Ee—(Kisses Marshal) Did Marshall give me the signal?

Marshall: No! (To Lily) I didn’t, I swear(xuroo).

Barney: But see—at least, tonight, I get to sleep knowing, Marshall and Me… never going to happen. You should’ve kissed her.

Ted: Urgh, I should’ve kissed her. What about when she gets back from Orlando?

Barney: A week? That’s like—a year in hot girl time. She’ll forget all about you. Mark my words: you will never see that one again.

(notices Robin on Metro News 1 On TV)

Ted: There she is…

Lily: Ooo. She’s cute! (To Carl) Hey Carl, turn it up!

Robin: (on TV) …persuaded him to reconsider at which point the man came down off the ledge, giving this bizarre story a happy ending. Reporting from

Marshall: Huh, guy didn’t jump

Robin: (on TV) Metro One News, back to you bill.

Ted: I’m goanna go kiss her. Right now.

Marshall: Oh—Dude, it’s midnight. As your future lawyer I’m goanna advise you: that’s freakin’ crazy!

Ted: I never do anything crazy! I’m always waiting for the moment! Planning the moment! Well she’s leaving tomorrow this may be the only moment I’m goanna get! I gotta do what that guy couldn’t, I gotta take the leap(salto)! Okay not a perfect metaphor, for me it’s fall in love and get married—for him it’s… death.

Barney: Actually, that is a perfect metaphor. By the way, did I congratulate you two? (Raises glass to Lily and Marshall)

Ted: I’m doing this. (Starts to leave)

Lily: Let’s go (pulls Marshall up)

Marshall: Word up (de acordo)!

Lily: We’re coming with you.

Ted:…Barney?

Barney: Alright, but under one condition.

[Cut to Scene in Taxicab]

Barney: (happy) look at you, you beautiful bastard, you suited up! This is totally going in my blog!

Ted: (To Ranjit—Cabdriver) Stop the car. Uh—pull over right here. I gotta do something.

(Runs into the bistro he was in on his date with Robin climbs on peoples table)

Ted: Excuse me, pardon me. (grabs(agarra,colle) the Blue French Horn) Enjoy your coffee. (Runs away)

Waitor: Hey, HEY!

(Jumps back into the taxicab)

Ted: go, go, GO! (looks to his friends. Shrugs(encollese de hombros)) Everybody brings flowers.

[Fade out]

-----

Scene Seven

(Taxicab)

Ted: (Exhales) Okay. Moment of truth. Wish me luck. (Exhales)

Barney: Ted’s goanna get it on with a TV reporter (nods. Laughs.) This just in. Okay (holds hand up for high-fives)

Lily: Kiss her, Ted. Kiss her good.

Marshall: Kiss the crap out of that girl

Ted: Marshall, remember this night. When you’re the best man at our wedding and you give a speech, you’re goanna tell this story. (exits cab)

Barney: Why does he get to be the best man? (Shouts out) I’M YOUR BEST FRIEND!

Narrator: As I walked up to that door a million thoughts raced through my mind. Unfortunately, one particular thought did not.

[Flashback to Date]

Robin: I’ve got five dogs.

[Flashback Ends]

(Ted presses the buzzer (tocar o timbre), dogs begin to bark (ladrar). Walks down the steps back toward the cab)

Ted: Not good, not good, not good, not good.

Lily: No!

Marshall: Go back in there!

Barney: You’re wearing a suit!

(Ted walks back toward the door)

Robin: (from window) Ted?

Ted: Hi! (Silence) I was just uh—(hold up Smurf Penis, aka French Horn)

Robin: Come on up.

(Ted enters)

[In the Cab]

Marshall: He’s in.

Barney: So, (looks to the cabdriver) Ranjit… you must’ve done it with a Lebanese girl.

Lily: Okay—that’s my Barney Limit. (Starts to leave the cab) I’m goanna see if that Bodega(tenda de comestibles) has a bathroom. (Leaves)

Ranjit: Actually, I’m from Bangladesh.

Barney: The women hot there?

Ranjit: Here’s a picture of my wife! (Shows picture)

Barney: (Whispers to Marshall) Simple no would have sufficed(ser suficiente). (To Ranjit) She’s lovely.

[Cut to Robin’s Apartment]

Robin: So, Ted. What brings you back to Brooklyn at one in the morning in a—suit.

Ted: I was just hoping to get those olives… that you said I could have.

Robin: Would you like those olives with some Gin and Vermouth?

Ted: Are you trying to get me drunk?

Robin: For starters (turns music on. Leaves to the kitchen)

Ted: (Looks up and mouths) Thank you.

[Cut to the Cab]

Barney: So, Marshall. This “Olive Theory” based on you and Lily?

Marshall: Yeah…

Barney: You hate olives? Lily loves them, you can’t stand them.

Marshall: Yeah, hate olives.

Barney: Two weeks ago, Spanish bar on 79th Street, dish of olives—you had some. What up?

Marshall: (looks around for sign of Lily) You have to swear that this does not leave this cab.

Barney: I swear.

Ranjit: (Cuts into conversation) I swear.

Marshall: On our first date, I ordered a Greek salad; Lily asked if she could have my olives. I said, “Sure… I hate olives.”

Barney: But you like olives!

Marshall: Well, I was eighteen, okay? I was a virgin. Been waiting for my whole life for a pretty girl to want my olives.

Barney: Marshall, I’m going to get you an early wedding present. Don’t get married.

[Cut to Robin’s Apartment]

(Robin and Ted are dancing, all five dogs are watching)

Robin: I think I like your “Olive Theory”.

Ted: I think I like your French Horn.

Robin: I think I like your nose.

Ted: I think I’m in love with you.

[Cut to the bar]

(After Ted tells them the story)

Lily, Marshall and Barney: What?

[Cut to the year 2030.]

Son and Daughter: What?

[Cut to Robin’s Apartment]

Robin: What?

[Cut to the Cab]

Barney: Come on man, you said your stomach’s been hurting, right? You know what that is! Hunger. You’re hungry for experience. Hungry for something new. Hungry for olives. But you’re too scared to do anything about it.

Marshall: Yeah, I’m scared, okay? But when I think about spending the rest of my life with Lily… committing forever, no other women (Lily appears behind Marshall in the open window) doesn’t scare me at all. I’m marrying that girl. (Lily pops her head in from the window. Marshall turns around) Lily. Lily, I like olives.

Lily: We’ll make it work. (They kiss.)

Ranjit: aww.

[Cut to Robin’s Apartment]

(Long Silence)

Ted: So Orlando, you goanna hit Disney World?

Robin: You love me?

Ted: Oh, god, I can’t believe I said that. Why did I say that? Who says that? I should just go. (Gets up)

Robin: Hold on(espera). (Gets up) Wait a minute. (Hands him Olives) Promised you these.

Ted: Olives. Thanks. I love you. What’s wrong with me?

[Cut to cab]

Barney: Why are we still sitting here? Let’s go! We can still make last call. What do you say Lil? (Pirate Accent) Yo, ho ho and a bottle o’ rum? (Silence) ‘Cuz you’re a pirate…

Lily: Okay, eye patch gone—(takes eye patch off and throws it at Barney) And we can’t just abandon Ted. If it doesn’t go well up there he’s gonna need some support.

Marshall: It’s been like twenty minutes. You think they’re doin’ it?

Barney: You think they’re doing it in front of the dogs?

Marshall: Doggie style. (Laughs)

Barney: I had this girl in college; she had a golden retriever—

Lily: Okay, we can go to the bar, just stop talking.

Barney: Hit it Ranjit. (They drive off)

(Ted and Robin come out the door)

Ted: So when you tell this story to your friends, could you avoid the word “psycho(sicópata)”? I prefer…eccentric (excéntrico).

Robin: Good night, psycho (smiles). (Ted sarcastically clutches heart. Realizes friends left him)

Ted: Great (before Robin closes the door) Umm… how do I get to the F Train?

Robin: Oh, um—two blocks (comes out) that way (points) and take a right.

Ted: (upset/tired) Thanks. (Walks down the steps. Robin begins to walk in) You know what? (Robin stops. Ted turns around). I’m done being single. I’m not good at it. Look, obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met you love her. But… it sucks that you can’t. I’ll tell you something though, if a woman—not you… just some hypothetical woman—were to bare with me through all this. I think I’d make a damn(maldito, condenado) good husband. Because that’s the stuff I’d be good at. Stuff like making her laugh and being a good father… and walking her five hypothetical dogs. Being a good kisser.

Robin: Everyone thinks they’re a good kisser.

Ted: Oh, I’ve got references.

Robin: Good night, Ted. (Shake hands.)

Ted: And I’m a good hand shaker

Robin: that’s a pretty great hand shake. (Looks him in the eyes(mirar os ollos))

[Cut to later at the bar]

Ted: And that was it, probably never see her again. (Silence) What?

Marshall: That was the signal!

Lily: That long lingering(persistente,prolongado) handshake(apretón de mans)—you should’ve kissed her!

Barney: There’s no such thing as the signal. But yeah—that was the signal.

(Ranjit appears)

Rangit: Signal (nods)

Marshal: Ah, Carl thank you. Something I gotta do.

Carl: By the way, you should’ve kissed her.

Ted: Carl!? (turns to friends) You guys weren’t there.

(Marshall Pops cork without injuring anyone)

Lily: I am so turned on right now.

Ted: Guys, trust(confiar) me. I’ve seen the signal. That was not the signal.

Barney: Yeah Ted, we’re not on you anymore.

Marshall: (Toasting) To my fiancé!

Lily: (smiles) to the future!

Ranjit: To one hell of a night!

Ted: That was not the signal!

(Scene pans out)

Narrator: I asked her about it years later, and yeah, that was the signal. I could’ve kissed her. But that’s the funny thing about destiny.

[Flashback to Robin Throwing Drink in Ted’s face]

Narrator: … it happens whether you plan it or not. I mean I…

[Flashback to Robin laughing at Ted’s “Smurf Penis” joke]

Narrator: … never thought I’d see that girl again. But it…

[Flashback to Robin looking down at Ted from her apartment window]

Narrator: …turns out, I was just too close…

[Flashback to Robin and Ted dancing]

Narrator: …to the puzzle to see the picture that was forming. Because that kids…

[Cut to year 2030. Kids intently(atentamente) listening keenly (profundamente) interested]

Narrator: …is the true story, of how I met your Aunt Robin.

Son: Aunt Robin?

Daughter: I thought this was about how you met mom!

Narrator: Will you relax? I’m getting to it. (Son and daughter sit back unpleased) like I said:

[Cut to panning out at the bar]

Narrator: …it’s a long story.

[Fades out]
 

END OF EPISODE

==========================
TRANSCRIBED BY LAGUA FOR TWIZ TV.COM - FREE TV SCRIPTS DATABASE

SUMMARY

I'm talking about the first episode of how I met your mother. The TV series starts with Ted explaining his children,who he met their mother. He talks about 30 years before. Ted's best friend  is going to marry whit his fiancée, then Ted get worry about his age and his love life.

            At the same time he met an amazing girl,he believed she would be his future wife, but he spoilt the dream at the beginning. He said her he was in love with her at the first date.  And all took place among funny situations. When it seemed story had finished, Ted only had told how he met a present friend.